Dear Diary

Weight: 9st 10lbs (stubborn)
Cans of Coke: 6
Middle Finger Tendon Integrity (MFTI): 0.73

I'd spent the week holed up in a posh hotel in Pitlochry, discussing Electrification in Dusty Atmospheres. It did nothing for the waistline, and Pitlochry appears to be a Highlands Theme Park so horrid it has driven out all the local Scots. However, I did get to watch super-slo-mo videos of people re-creating volcanic explosions in the lab. Those guys are in the right job.

I returned Sheff-side exhausted, hung over and desperate to go climbing. Toby has a well-earned reputation for climbing without undue haste. It's ok though, because he rectifies this by starting early. So he picked me up from my house at half-past-early and we drove, bleary-eyed to Long Wall. I don't want to say bad things about Long Wall, so I'd best not say anything at all. It's long in one direction at least, I guess. Nevertheless I did manage to have an enjoyable day here. Toby dispatched Atlantic Realm, which is apparently 7c+ now half of it has fallen down. Toby did it with great ease, or at least very statically. It can be hard to tell which. Then I managed to comfortably flash the hard climbing and embarrass myself horribly on the easy top slab. Note to self: power screaming on 6b slab climbing is never acceptable.

On Sunday I returned to Malham to continue what is definitely going to be a long term affair with Rainshadow. I also cleaned out some bird's nests from Thriller/Victor Hugo so you really have no excuse now, do you? Once again I was struck by just how strong everyone is these days. Apart from myself there was one other 9a aspirant there that day, four people trying 8c's and teenage girls getting close to 8a's. It's a far cry from ten years ago, where you could climb an 8b and spend the rest of the day basking in the admiration of your peers. This makes me sad.

I'm sadder still by progress on Rainshadow. I firmly believe that I am capable of getting through the crux roof from the ground, but there is a long move on the headwall that I fear is just too hard. I can't do this move reliably off the rope, and you've already done at least 8c+'s worth of climbing by the time you get there. I remain hopeful, but not optimistic. The only thing that makes me feel better is how bad Alex Barrows is on this route. During his epic dogging sessions which seemed to last a day each, I estimate he spent 0.34 microseconds actually holding his own weight. I can only assume his belayer has very bruised hips this morning.

Still, no amount of failure on Alex's part will constitute success on mine, so I'd better do something about this headwall move soon. Stay tuned for more on that, and an upcoming blog post in which I alienate the entire female climbing community, shortly before the women's climbing symposium kicks off.